I can’t tell you how many Boss Babe, Diva friends I have in my life that I love and adore. From pro-dancers, to real estate moguls, from farm owners to online boutique mavens. The Boss Babe movement is real and the friendships and collaborative goals are mega!
I also have an incredible amount of young women seeking advice, coaching, counseling and mentorship in the business and entrepreneurial space.
I’ve created a mentorship space for Artists and Musicians. My husband and I have opened a physical studio for in person mentorship, meetings and counsel. I also have an online community of beautiful women who are forging relationships with each other in the area of friendship, purpose building and collaboration.
As we spend time together, we find the reality that all Boss Babes come short in some area. We have this way of doing what major corporations do on a much smaller budget. We look the part, act the part and truly are the part. With our creativity and our drive we are able to take $25 dollars and make it look like a $10,000 campaign. With the way our minds study and our hearts align with our calling, we are able to make humble beginnings look like a mogul status.
There is one thing however, that I find more often than any other thing in Boss Babes. There’s this idea that everyone we’re looking at has it all. The photo’s we post, the captions we create. We really are amazing human beings, but in the same we we have shortcomings, we seem to believe everyone else is just perfect! That fear of not being as special or “perfect” as the ladies we watch, gets in the way of so much. We fear letting our guard down. When it comes time to join forces with the women we think so highly of, we clam up! No matter how many people I meet, there seems to be one common factor missing from most! The art of collaboration!
For some reason, we have this amazing knack for DIY. We can make things happen alone, but when it comes to bringing in new minds and help to go to our next level, we just can’t fix our lips to say, “I need your help”. If you’re a part of my latest online offering “The Sistership” then you’ve already began to notice how important I deem friendship and relationship between each other. We must step outside of our comfort zone and create together. It’s what builds us. It’s what grows us. Both the mentor and the mentee. The teacher and the student. The Boss Babe and the Boss Babe!
We don’t have the millions of dollars in the bank that we assume everyone else does, so we don’t even put our requests out there. We press towards the mark and we never come to full expansion because we ask not.
In this piece, I’d like to share 3 tools to use in “Boss Babe Collaboration”. I’ve used them over the years and I’ve seen them be used by other amazing moguls! I’ll share a few behind the scenes moments of what I’ve experienced in my life. I pray this encourages each of you as you push forward in your Bossy endeavors.
Bossy Raw Ingredients
Do you have an amazing singing voice? You want a record deal or a studio session. You want someone to manage you or become your agent. Master what you are presenting. Sure you have a nice hair style. Yes you dress well. Of course you have a great set of abs and boy is that a pretty guitar, but are you ear training regularly? Are you sitting with a voice coach or spending that extra cash on new shoes.
If you aren’t mastering what you’re presenting, when the opportunity comes and it’s time to show up for the “next level”, you won’t pass the test.
The truth is, even with all the glitz and glam, branding and big talk, products come down to their raw ingredients. If your raw ingredients can’t pass the test then stop dressing them up and looking for the come up. Master what you’re presenting. Be the best you can be at it. The fluff will come but first, you’ve gotta have epic raw ingredients.
Match her bossy hustle
If you want help and you have an amazing offering that would go to its next level with the endorsement of someone else, be sure that you are showing that someone else how they will benefit from standing next to your offering.
So what, you don’t have money. Bosses can see the value in collaboration OUTSIDE OF MONEY! A real boss can look at a situation and say, “I can benefit from being in this room, now how do I get invited?” The problem is, the sister with the access to the room is too afraid to invite other bosses in! What do you have access to that may be greater than monetary value to someone? Can you list 5 things that will benefit the other person if they join with you?
Do you have unique demographics? Will joining with you enhance the other persons base? Maybe they’ll be able to sell their products at your event? Maybe they’ll have the opportunity to learn a skill that they wouldn’t learn otherwise.
Get these benefits written down and typed out. Be able to share a letter of interest with whoever you’re pursuing. Show them at least five things that will benefit them by joining forces with you.
I can’t tell you how many times people have said, “I’d like to hire you, but I don’t have the fee”. How many of those people knew people I didn’t know that I’d love to be introduced to? How many of those people want me to come to a country I’ve never been to but wanted to travel to? How many of those people could introduce me to an audience I’ve been wanting to meet? How about this? How many of those people did I just wish to be pals with?
Sometimes opportunities are bigger than money. If you have a unique benefit, mention it! Talk up your brand. Talk up your audience. Talk up your past accomplishments. What has your business done for YOU that it can do for your potential COLLABORATOR?
don’t assume (don’t be “bossy”)
When you’re asking for things from others, beware! Sometimes they don’t want what you’re offering them for reasons you just can’t see. Don’t be discouraged and don’t get bossy! I can’t tell you the amount of times people have shouted my team down trying to get something from us that we simply didn’t have!
Sometimes Boss Babes don’t actually have what you’re asking for. In the same way your Instagram looks like you have a professional photographer taking all your pics. You look like a pro-makeup artist does your make up all the time. You look like your bank account might be on 10! Looks can be deceiving, not always on purpose, but just because, you’ve assumed.
Many of the bosses we look at are working long hours, pulling double shifts, going to school while they hustle and even raising a family behind the scenes. Sometimes we may be asking for something they genuinely don’t have.
“Hey Sis, can you make a speech at so and so high school?”... sure she’s a YouTube icon, but maybe she’s introverted and only talks to cameras.
“Hey Love, can you donate $400 to my Thanks Giving turkey charity?” ...sure, she’s a finance savings expert, but how do you know she’s not saving her own money and doesn’t have more than the $400 she’s saving?
“Hey Girl Hey! Can you fly to South Dakota, to talk to teen moms about getting an education?”... I’m sure she would LOVE to do that but how do you know she can afford a flight and a hotel to talk to those teens?
When you’re asking things of people, don’t assume they have everything they need, to be available for you. Sometimes, sure their heart is in the right place. Absolutely they’re a nice person. If you ask and they simply can’t be available for you, hold on to their number. If it’s a divine connection, take a second chance later down the line after you’ve taken the time to think about the opportunity you provided. Don’t be afraid to ask WHY someone can’t do something. Your eyes may be opened.
I remember when I first started my record label 5 years ago. People assumed I was looking to sign new artists. I was literally receiving emails with music, kids were stopping me in the streets to sing for me. Parents were pulling my arm asking me for something I genuinely didn’t have.
At the time I was just learning how to run a label, how much money it would cost to record an album independently and what issues I might face as I distribute or release music. I was in no position to experiment my Record Label CEO skills on a new artist. I had to go first before I could sign anyone.
I’ve learned a lot since then. I’ve developed a passion to teach entrepreneurs what it takes to run a label, a business and just a lifestyle brand. I’ve created online courses to teach young people what owning a label and being an independent artist actually looks like. Before, they assumed what I had and then asked for it. They thought I was just saying no because I was holding on to something I had. Little did they understand. I actually didn’t have what they were wanted. Now, I’ve created tools to teach them what they’re asking for. When they ask why, I can take them to school. It’s okay to ask why. You never know what you’ll learn.
By sharpening your offering, benefiting another Boss Babe and keeping assumptions at bay, you broaden your chances of collaboration.
My biggest piece of advice here truly is, DON’T BE AFRAID TO ASK. Get your ducks in a row. Gather your assets and present you OPPORTUNITY with confidence. Tell them what YOU have. Be honest about what it means to collaborate with you. Have respect for the people you reach out to and always remember that people need people. EVERYONE wants relationship, friendship and collaboration. You will meet your connection. You will perfect your presentation and you will be well received. Timing is everything. Be patient with people. Be patient with yourself. Most of all, be patient with the process.
A Fellow Boss Babe,
P.S. - If you haven’t already, Join The Sistership. It’s an online mentorship community where I share bi-weekly videos and participate in online chats. There, the sisters and I lift each other up, encourage each other, forge relationships and dive into our purpose.
If you’re a creative entrepreneur or up-and-coming artist, we’ve just launched the fall “R&B Songwriters Course”. You can learn more about that and our Artist Development courses by clicking the buttons below.